Chapter 1: The Necessity of Selfishness

Let's dive into the reasons why putting yourself first can lead to a more fulfilling life.

I openly admit that I prioritize myself. While some may view this negatively, I believe it’s not inherently wrong.

In a YouTube video I recently watched, a woman recounted her experience of moving in with a 58-year-old man when she was just under 20. She initially met him while working as a housekeeper for his family and became entangled in their personal dramas. Living with him cost her nearly a decade of her life, and ultimately, she gained nothing in return. Despite her efforts, which extended beyond her job description and even included caring for his ill parents and disabled brother, she ended up with no benefits from the relationship. Once his parents passed away, he simply sent her away.

This raises the question: what did she truly gain? There was no financial support, marriage, or children to show for her sacrifices.

You can watch this intriguing video here:

While I don't want to place blame, I can’t imagine living in such a situation. I would have asked, "What am I getting out of this relationship? Why am I the only one giving?" It seems like a classic one-sided relationship.

Here’s where the idea of selfishness becomes beneficial.

Selfishness often carries a negative connotation, yet it is essential for achieving a happy and balanced existence. By prioritizing your own needs, you will find that you rely less on others. Once you become content with who you are, there’s no need for controlling or manipulative behavior, nor will you feel dependent on others for validation.

If you neglect yourself, life can spiral out of control. Daily challenges can create drama, but taking time for self-reflection can help you regain perspective and enhance your enjoyment of life.

Once you allocate time for yourself and clear your mind, you often discover solutions to persistent problems. It is crucial that you make time for this. When your schedule is filled with caring for others, self-care becomes even more vital.

Being self-focused isn’t inherently wrong; it simply means you’re ensuring your own happiness and fulfillment.

Some might argue that societal norms discourage acting in one’s own best interest due to the fear of being labeled "selfish." Many individuals experience this, often stemming from low self-worth and the belief that they don’t deserve to pursue their own desires.

To truly thrive, you need to treat yourself with kindness and acknowledge your worth. This includes giving yourself some much-needed "me time" and respecting your own needs.

Consider all the relationships you nurture: whether it’s managing family responsibilities, spending time with friends, or maintaining partnerships, you invest immense energy into these connections. It’s natural to feel stress when those around you are struggling. However, the most critical relationship is the one you have with yourself.

Don’t forget to care for your own well-being; you are the cornerstone of your happiness. Without that foundation, other relationships will falter.

By treating yourself with the same compassion you extend to others, you can cultivate a greater sense of happiness and control over your life. Over time, this will naturally enhance your other relationships and bring them into balance.

Chapter 2: Insights from Inspiring Talks

In another enlightening video titled How to Live Life Without Regrets, speaker Noam Gershony shares valuable lessons on achieving a fulfilling life while avoiding the pitfalls of regret. He emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and finding personal happiness.